Friday, 30 December 2005

no Use for a title (or: I am too lazy to think of one)

on PBS right now is that Roy Orbison Black and White special, that seems to be the perennial thing to show during a pledge drive. But whenever I notice it is on I watch it...I really love it (not the pledge drive part, that I could do without). It makes me feel very melancholy though...I am drinking wine and that makes me have a hard time spelling or it looks perennial I think that is wrong but what can you do? huh? Anyway today was a fun day at work, because we were overstaffed with nothing to do and so we stood around and chatted. I love chatting at this type of job you are thrust into a relationship with people that you might not hang out with otherwise...and sometimes they are cooler to be with than people in your own particular style of friends...I dunno if that makes sense and that is the wine too ;) but what I mean to say is it was fun today...It is nice to have a job that I don't dread going to...if only I made more money!!!

I don't know if I said so, but Christmas went family drama it was all nice and good and I think we may be on the road to acceptance...(meaning the stages of grief...this is personal shorthand.) I mean it was okay. We pulled it together.

My New Years Resolution, which I hate to make because resolutions are total crap and just another thing to feel guilty about screwing up on, but it is to not be so paranoid, I mean I seriously worry about stuff all the time...random bizarre stuff..I am just so afraid of loss.

Okay don't drink and write maybe that is better resolution... :P

Wednesday, 21 December 2005

it's pouring rain again....

I can't believe how crazily it's raining, and one of my windshield wipers has had it---it's held together with a rubber band and I have to hurry and buy a replacement. Hope it doesn't rain on Christmas...I used to drive in the rain often when I was in college but I haven't done it in a while (on the freeway, at least).

I had my sister burn me a CD with some Christmas music on it, she has one of those Time Life collections with all kinds of songs...there is a 12 Days of Christmas that I don't know who is singing, but he sounds like Frasier, I mean Kelsey Grammer. It has a good mix of churchy songs and bubblegummy songs. She also had a CD of a childrens Christmas album that I had when I was little on 8-track's kids singing and pretty obnoxious but it made me sentimental...everything does these days.

Sunday, 18 December 2005

wigging out!

"I was also amused to note that Jodie Foster's hoop skirts were of considerably smaller circumference."
"Our commentaries disagree on the interpretation of this double-barreled retort."
et cetera, et fix up

In other news with regard to my questionable musical taste...we just got Neil Diamond tickets! So the whole Neil Diamond thing has come full circle (what whole Neil Diamond thing?)

me and you are subject to the blues now and then

Today at work I was going to buy some stuff before I left. Laundry detergent and that, and the lines were as long as a long thing that you could compare a line I went back to the photo lab to pay for my stuff, well my girl was helping at the "guest service" counter so I stood there a moment, hmm, should I go back to the lines and the young fellow who works on the floor said, oh, I can just ring you up if you are waiting to go. So he did and another young fellow came by and asked if he was training for the photo lab and he said "no, I'm just checking her out" and laughed then I grinned and grinned because it reminded me of Ghostbusters. "I'll take Miss Barret back to her apartment and check her out...I'll go check out Miss Barret's apartment!!" Other than that today it poured down buckets of rain, but my car seems to be running again so that's good. And I'm rambling on and onnnnn...

Saturday, 17 December 2005

Wussy Old Me

Yesterday before work I went to see King Kong, meaning I got up early to see it cuz that sucker is three hours long....big mistake seeing it before work- I thought I might get choked up a little or something but there I was in the theater sobbing my fool head off, awful embarassing hiccuping sobs..then I had to pull myself together within 45 minutes to go to work. Then when I got home from work I cried some more, in a more general way. I wanted to go to sleep early but I had to call my mother and sister to tell them I would not be staying overnight this weekend, I yu7hav to8 u sorry minka stepped on the keyboard just now...i have to work Sunday for Nick but that is fine and dandy because he is working christmas eve for me...both my mother and sister start going on on on on on about stuff...i'm all uh huh uh huh uh huh. Then I finally go to bed, and my last boyfriend who has decided that now is a good time to start acting like an asshole calls me at midnight. Drunk. Twice.

So this morning I get up all early because I have to drive to the bay and back in one day and know what? My car battery died. So fuck it all I will chuck it all and eat sweets and watch movies at home with my cat. I need that... actually that sounds like a good way to spend the day. That, and doing laundry. It's raining outside and all. My sister that I live with had AAA so they came and jumped the car and it was fine and I just drove around for 40 minutes listening to the Bee Gees I'm not sure why, it seemed like a happy thing to listen to. Cause we're living in a world of fools, breaking us down, when they all should let us be.

Tuesday, 13 December 2005

"oh my God...that's not a mannequin!"

Someone just said that on the TV, I think it was Law & Order. I think Buzznet is fucked up again tonight and that is annoying. It's very tweaky and I click on links that take me somewhere else. Also my computer is acting weird. Maybe it's an OMEN.

Did you know that microwavable taquitos can go from semi-frozen to scalding hot in 2.5 seconds? The roof of my mouth knows it...well. I am a junk food junkie this is something fabulous and healthy... the Luna Bar. Years ago my friend recommended I try it and the kind I tried was not so hot, it tasted too they have new flavors, S'mores, Cookies and Cream, Dulce de Leche.....oh man they are seriously yummy. Like candy plus vitamins and antioxidants...I highly recommend them,

Yesterday at work we had over 1,000 Christmas cards to print, plus 55 rolls of film...some people must seriously take time off during the holiday was busy like a weekend.

I am can't wait to see King Kong but I work from 11-7:30 it would have to be a late show if at all...I guess I will probably have to wait but I am very excited to see it...the original was one of my dad's favorites... I wish he was here to see this one. I wonder if they will have in on the IMAX screen in SF, if so that's worth the trip...or Dublin that is even closer...I am thinking in print right now (anyone reading this...."zzzzzzzzz").

Okay anyway...the holiday season is almost over. Time to put our past behind us and move on. Also the full moon will soon be here and gone and gone with it will be my I was in a silly mood, though, and everything that would normally be annoying seemed pretty goddamn hilarious. And that is the mood I like the best.

Tuesday, 6 December 2005

Buzznet Addict

I just went in to check on Buzznet and it is down for maintenance....NOOOOOOOOOOO! I am officially addicted. For me it's social. "demented and sad, but social". Another movie quote, I don't have an original thought in my head I guess...

The twins were very funny the other day...they are usually like me and don't like to talk on the phone for very long. But they just got back from Disneyland and both of them jabbered on a mile a minute for a long time. They were brave and went on the upside down roller coaster and even the Tower of Terror. Their favorite was the Jungle niece went in to a detailed description of each and every feature on it, and what the ride operator said, and she barely slowed down to catch her breath while talking. Then about halfway through describing it she said "oh, and they aren't real animals, they're mechanical!"

I was at my mother's house on Saturday for her birthday. She had a Playboy magazine (On a side note, my last boyfriend used to have a subscription to that, and though I like the articles - the articles are truly interesting much like the chicken at Hooters is actually very tasty indeed so it's not just all purely about looking at titties- if my mother was coming for a visit I would give him all the magazines and say "get this outta here!!!". But my mother's husband has a subscription and they leave em laying around like it was People magazine or something. I guess I have more of a stick up my butt then my mother these days and that's just sad. But the hairless women freak me out, what is up with completely shaved coochies that's a bit...I dunno, appealing to pedophiles...I like the classic pin ups like Bettie Page but I digress as usual...) anyway there was an article that contained a transcript of a tape that Marilyn Monroe had recorded for her psychiatrist...and I thought how fucked up it is that she told someone things in confidence and years later here it is for anyone to read. That was a superlong side note and a really brief main point to the paragraph heheheheh.

Friday, 2 December 2005

Benadryl plus a teensy bit of vodka

is the fabulous insomnia cure of the evening...

need to get off this computer post-haste because I am surrogate mom tonight, for a 16 year old...level headed but I'm the one around in case she gets into a scrape...hope she doesn't due to the aforementioned b & v...she is a smart cookie my niece but her mom, my sis, well if i was in her shoes (my niece...what am i saying heheheh) I would be rebelling big point is she has my phone number and I am dial up so I better bail in case she needs to call me...she's on a date, new guy.....good thing i don't have kids I would be too paranoid...blah blah

My own mother rules...her bday 2mrw so I am going to see her, she said she made the special winter soup she makes every year, niiiiice and also she bought brie and pepper jack and bread since she knew I'm comin' over...she knows I am starvin'! Happy birthday Mama!

Thursday, 1 December 2005


I hate it. If I don't take a benadryl or something I have the worst time falling asleep. And I have no benadryl, besides now it's too late to take anything or I won't be able to wake up in the morning. The following is an experiment:

hmm did that work...

ANd insomnia makes me overly paranoid (meaning even more paranoid than usual) and today there is a lump under my hurts but I am more or less certain it is a spider bite or something because it is red at the surface and I only just noticed it today. But my paranoid sleepless mind keeps thinking of Debra Winger in Terms of Endearment. They say a mind is a terrible thing to waste but sometimes it a terrible thing, period.